now

(3/2) now      SOLD      79x27.5  acrylic on door

Working on recycled doors, thinking about the space between mom and me, listening to Rural Alberta Advantage sing about their grandfather in the ground and it dawns on me, I was watching the Grammy Awards  for a reason…what???. 
Okay, lets’ go back. I hate and by hate, I mean I have never gotten into but do appreciate country music (note: I grew up listening to the worst country music ever: Oak Ridge Boys and Curstal Gayle and yes, I do mean Curstal,  not Crystal, as that is what my father called her.) But the other night on the Grammy’s a country song was on about going back to a house just to be there for a minute and revisit the memories with a promise to leave.  I seriously had to fight back tears as I realized I could never go back to the window in my family dining room to check to see if my date was there. I could never again sit in the family room with my brother laughing about SNL or yell at my sister in the bathroom. What happens, how do these moments slip away? Kate Bush: “Give me these moments back” (She’s Having a Baby is my favorite movie/song of all time) It is all coming together. The art, the tears, the life I have lived to this moment and the constant fear that my children will grow up and leave me and my pretending that I am sooooooo good with that.

This surfacing series is such a huge life commentary on then and future and the present. I so NEVER live in the present always the past, with sadness that I cannot go back OR all the things I have to get done in the future to make my life better then….frick when is then we are never there. The surfacing, when is it? Am I only in the present when I am painting. I need to meditate. I always say I am going to when Oprah talks about it and yet when I think about it it makes me giggle with the ridiculousness of it. Just sitting quiet,  thinking…hilarious aren’t there things to accomplish????   
When is the now? 
Is that why I must paint? Because that is the only time I am in it? Or, am I missing it entirely…I am missing it, when the hell do I surface or is that a joke? It is not funny, I am not laughing. 

unlock

unlock
11.5x15.5 SOLD

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unlock enlarged

unlock

8.26.08: I was not sure until tonight why I titled this unlock but now I know. I have beat the system, won the game, got the gold, I have the golden ticket...I can blog again!!!!!! My site has been screwy since I got home from the beach. I have not been able to change my layout or preview my page for two weeks. But not tonight! I just figured out the HTML. I am Steve Jobs tonight!!!! It feels so good to finally: UNLOCK!!!!!!

webs

webs
9x9 $100.00

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webs  enlarged

webs

8.14.08: I don't recall why I titled this webs. I can tell you that our friend's, the Solari family, made it down to the beach today to spend the weekend with us. I can also tell you that I will sleep much better tonight then last night!!!

settle

settle
9x9 SOLD

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settle enlarged

settle

8.13.08: Okay my first night alone at the beach. The kids are here but they are sleeping and there is no other adult in the home. I am in Aptos, CA, close to Santa Cruz. I am in my husband's family beach home. Someone is always here with me, so this is weird. All the sudden the beautiful trees surrounding the home seem to more cover it. There is no white noise which is always creepy. I am super ready for it to be morning and has just gotten fully dark. I need to: settle

uneasy

uneasy
9x9 $100.00

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uneasy enlarged

uneasy

8.13.08: Same night, should go to bed, still: Uneasy!!!

twilight

twilight
9x9 $100.00

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twilight

8.10.08: reading a fun new novel for the beach trip. I heard about it on CBS sunday morning, my favorite show, which makes me an old lady according to my friend Kelly. I have to sell the book a little because it is sold in the young adult section. And YES, I am pretty sure it was right next to Sweet Valley High books. With that said, it was written by a fellow Mom who had a crazy dream one night about a vampire and she woke the next morning with a new life dream and started to bring her vision to life. It is a best seller now being made into a movie, releasing this December. She is also releasing her fourth book in the series. It is a light read with teenage moments in it, but perfect for a foggy week at the beach. More importantly it is a lesson to us all to put ourselves out there. She was not a writer (I am not either as my spelling/grammar errors give away) She had a good idea and she went for it, kudos to you and to anyone else giving it a shot!!!!: TWILIGHT

wedding

wedding
19.5x28.5 $400.00

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wedding enlarged

wedding

8.8.08: lucky day, lucky day!!! I had the wonderful honor today of getting to participate in my best friends sister's wedding. She asked me when she got engaged (4 years ago) if I would please do her flowers. I did. And although the wedding was beautiful, the marriage will outshine it through the years. They are head over heels, over the moon, on fire for the lord in love!!! Thanks, Natalie and Ryan, for letting me take part in your: wedding.

spectator

spectator
15.5x11.5 $200.00

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spectator enlarged

spectator

8.3.08: Most of the time in your life as a mother you are hands on with your children, responding to their needs, reprimanding them for their bad behavior and praising them for good. Then there are the judgment calls, where you have to decide to stay out of it, let someone else reward them, or let them receive harsh discipline from an outsider. You have to become a: spectator.

malarkey

malarkey
19.5x19.5 $300.00

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malarkey enlarged

malarkey

6.10.08: FIRST, I promise I have been working!!! I had a couple of commission pieces that didn't get a post and I had a ton going on lately with the kiddos. More importantly, I need to update you on the goings on in my spring life of 2008. A whole lot of hooey, bull, or poppycock!!!! I have to talk in generalities because it is an on going situation. Suffice it to say people in power who enjoy the position are not my favorite. The current state of affairs is: MALARKEY!!!!

FUN WAY TO SHOW PHOTOS

hijack

hijack
9X9 $100.00

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hijack

4/28/08: I was targeted today by a serial potato coucher. I was minding my own business, doing some art and catching up on The Office and 30 Rock when my best friend's, boyfriend came into the room. He sat and started watching TV with me. It was the weirdest. We just watched Scrubs and then he left to return to the male wing of the home (the garage) with my husband. I was...HIJACKED!

BUSTED

BUSTED
9X9 $100.00

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busted

4/7/08: I did it again...I must have been distracted by the kids or late or something. It was a Monday???? I can't recall what was happening in my life that day. I suck...I am BUSTED!!!!

inhuman

inhuman
9x9 $100.00

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inhuman

4/4/08 Catching up on art and Oprah today and find myself very angry about the puppy mill situation. Sad and...inhuman!

horizon

horizon
10x10 SOLD

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horizon

3/31/08: My daughter named this piece. She said it looked like the sky at different times of the day. The large orange is during the day, the black and white is nighttime and the blue and bright yellow are dawn and dusk. Her original thought was sky, we compromised with...horizon.

PS: I finished Rescue Me!!!! I can't wait for season 4, I miss my friends/fictional characters that exist in a box. (HAPPY KIT!)

obsession

obsession
10x10 $100.00

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obsession

3/31/08: more on rescue me and driving, mostly my husband, oh, and sister, nuts: There have been three seasons of the show to air on FX since 2006. Each season has 16 plus episodes. Unlike the viewing public who must wait a week in between episodes, I am watching these back to back WHENEVER time allows. So, naturally, I have become one on the characters in my mind and I am talking about the show like it is my life...obsession.

destructive

destructive
10X10 $100.00

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destructive

3/26/08: YES! its is true, I have begun a new series on DVD and I am driving all those who know and love me CRAZY; more on that later. The new love of my life: Rescue Me. It is an FX show that has been on for years but I am playing catch up. Tommy Gavin is my new hero. I love him and I hate him, I love to hate him. The show is set in NY and revolves around the FDNY following 9/11. In one word the character is...destructive.

ranunculus

ranunculus
11.75X15.75 $200.00

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ranunculus enlarged

ranunculus

3/24/08 Spring has arrived and the snails have eaten all my gerber daisies in my front garden. SO, I am trying something new, perhaps the most beautiful flower EVER. It looks like a pretty tiered ball gown. Layers and layers of petals on top of one another forming a perfect ball...the ranunculus.

Discard

Discard
20x28 $400.00

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Discard

2-19-08. Our across the street neighbor passed away in the fall. It was a dramatic scene for my children to take in. There were several police cars, ambulance, family and finally a detective. Over the holiday and during these winter months, we a taken note of many changes to the property. There have been lawn people, family coming and going, a realtor. But today is the first day that has been kinda sad. They are finally going through the things in the house. This man's stuff. Possessions of a life...discard.

forgotten

forgotten
16x20 350.00

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forgotten

2-19-08 Okay...just found this in with my art things. I finished it recently, I just forgot about it. It has no date, no title, no information on life at that moment. So it has become...forgotten

Sacramento and Co

Here is the footage of the interview from Jan 21, 2008. It was a fun morning! My thanks to all the Sacramento and Co staff.

Fun Game

A fun game to play while watching the above footage...PAUSE MY CRAZY FACE. This game was invented by my friend Kelly and it is hours of fun. Simply press pause on my face when it is the most nutty and squishy. Compete with friends on who can create the best paused face. Good Luck!!!

exuberant

exuberant
19.5x19.5 $300.00

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exuberrant enlarged

exuberant

12-13-07 The last couple of afternoons at my house have been heavenly. Let me describe: 11:45 take my daughter off to school. Back home by 12. Son asleep by 12:30. That has not happened since he was an infant. I am...exuberant!!!

unglued

unglued
19.5x19.5 $300.00

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unglued enlarged

unglued

10/2/07: one of THOSE days today, one all mothers have in their heads. Nothing REALLY happens but you truly believe several times throughout the day that someone might die or that you might end up in the looney bin. All day with the stop that, don't touch that, don't go in the street, give that back to your sister, don't make me count to three and so on and so on. I thought I might come: unglued.

heroine

heroine
27.5x19.5 $400.00

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heroine enlarged

heroine

8/13/07-- finished this piece today!!! I am gearing up for my upcoming show at Bogle Winery, but I am also gearing up to return to teaching in just a couple of weeks. I wanted to bang out one more large piece before I had to refocus my attention. I love how it turned out, lots of new patterned scraps. Title was influenced by my new ipod and my old music. I was listening to Ani Difranco, one of my favorite artists. She has a great song she plays live entitled...heroine.

strength

strength
19.5x19.5 $300.00

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strength enlarged

graduation

graduation
19.5x19.5 SOLD

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graduation

6/07/07: my daughter, Moseley, graduated from Preschool today, so when I finished this piece I hade been working on it seemed to have named itself: graduation.

renewal

renewal
19.5 x 27.5 $400.00

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renewal

6/2/07: finished this piece today, Saturday. I have been working on it for more than two weeks. A lot has happened since I lasted posted. I had my first show and it was a huge sucess. Finn, my son just turned 2. Moseley my daughter is graduating from preschool on thursday and headed to Kindergarten in the fall. ..renewal.

pulse

pulse
19.5x15.5 $350.00

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pulse (enlarged)

disaster

disaster
15.5x19.5 SOLD!

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disaster (enlarged)

mine

mine
27.5x39.5 SOLD

MINE

this one is titled mine because I accept this one. It is one of my first pieces before I was constructing them correctly. It is done on paper not illustration board and the glue I used is not great. So, I get to keep it, I get to learn from my mistakes. It is in my living room above my couch and I really love it.

broad

broad
20x30 600.00 FRAMED

broad (enlarged)

broad (enlarged)

dislodge

dislodge
15.5x19.5 SOLD!

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dislodge (enlarged)

believe

believe
19.5x27.5 $250.00

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believe (enlarged)